“Found myself today
Oh, I found myself and ran away
Something pulled me back
The voice of reason I forgot I had
All I know is you’re not here to say
What you always used to say
But it’s written in the sky tonight”
I got some not so great news yesterday and I haven’t talked to many people about it. My sister isn’t doing good. It’s not looking good. On the way to work this morning my random play whatever playlist played Gonna Be Okay by Brent Morgan and then it followed it up with Someone’s Watching Over Me by Hilary Duff. I know it’s dumb, but this song was super important to me when I lost my grandfather and it was on repeat and I swear it never comes on my random playlist unless I am going through something that has me super stressed/worried, anxious, and just sad. Like a little sign he’s still around.
Anyways, that’s the story of how I cried the whole way to work despite trying to ignore reality and just do the unhealthy thing and not deal with my feelings. I wish things could be a little different in so many ways. I wish I could do something to take away her sickness. I wish I was somewhere else right now. I wish I could get some cuddles and a good massage. I wish I had a couple thousand dollars. I wish my Papa was still alive. I wish things were different.
But they are not, and so fake it til I make it around everyone who doesn’t know. It isn’t my story to share and so I’ll respect her wishes to keep it between us. She won’t find this site and I hope you won’t tell her. 😉 ha. Eh, I’m going to go finish my day.
“So I won’t give up
No, I won’t break down
Sooner than it seems life turns around
And I will be strong even if it all goes wrong
When I’m standing in the dark
I’ll still believe someone’s watching over me”