“I would’ve stuck around for ya
Would’ve fought the whole town, so yeah
Would’ve been right there, front row
Even if nobody came to your show
But you showed who you are, then one magical night…“
So little has happened, thank god. I got to see a friend from SC the other night. We met up, had dinner, spent some quality time together and for the first time in a while, I thought of someone I had somehow managed to forget about in their absence. It made me laugh, how ADHD gives you the gift of out of sight / out of mind. My friend brought them up though, they must have saw a flash of something across my face, however momentary it was there, because they changed the subject. They didn’t bring them up again. They rarely do when we talk, they know so little of the big picture. Anyways, ADHD brain did it’s thing and instantly popped this song in my mind and instead of feeling sad or anything, I giggled a little. I playfully popped their arm, I let the subject change, and ya know I didn’t get overly sad. The rest of our visit was amazing, it was right, it was happy and bittersweet due to how momentary it was. Just a quick hi, bye.
There is still so much I cannot talk about legally here. Ha. My therapist probably hates me at this point but man, I am so thankful she exists.
I finished my Spring 2026 semester with a C, a B, and an A – which is amazing considering everything that’s been going on this year. Summer semester starts soon and I am feeling really good about what is to come. I have set some small goals in place and I want to continue to work my way to them. Slow and steady baby. I’m on my way to better things and once again and this time I’m not going to look in the rear view anymore. Even when they message me, if they ever message me again. Once a friend, always a friend, and I’ll always been thereif they need me, but the chances of that ever being the case are slim to none. I needed them, as a friend, as someone to talk to and that will probably always be the case – but they can’t be that for me. They don’t want to be. So so long, farewell.
Healing journey restarted. I’m proud of myself.
“…I forgot that you existed
And I thought that it would kill me, but it didn’t
And it was so nice
So peaceful and quiet
I forgot that you existed
It isn’t love, it isn’t hate, it’s just indifference
I forgot that you
Sent me a clear message
Taught me some hard lessons
I just forget what they were
It’s all just a blur“